Tonight is one of those nights where I can't get Julia out of my head. And to be honest, I hope I forever think about her this much and that I will have countless nights like this. For those of you who knew Julia, I know you know what I mean. And for those of you who didn't, I hope you have grown to love her and love Jesus through everything you have seen and heard about her. Julia was unlike anyone I ever met. She had a way of finding that special place in your heart and making herself right at home. You see, Julia and I had this way of talking where we both talked at the same time. We both just always had so much to say to one another that we didn't see the need to wait. We knew what we both were saying and we didn't even have to take a breath. The snaps were enough for us to know that we were still following one another. It was incredible. Lots of hand motions and lots and lots of snaps. Looking back, I can see her most clearly saying "God is SO good." I see her mannerisms with it and it brings a smile to my face every time. She had a way of bringing out the best in people and she showed everyone she met what a life lived solely for the Lord looks like. Even though she was two years younger than me, I looked up to her ever since the first time we hit the dance floor together. Getting the chance to walk with Julia for the past two years gives me that much more confidence that our God is good. I can say whole heartedly that I know Jesus loves me because he gave me her friendship and showed me her spirit.
Back in February, I nominated Julia for a student award. Reading this nomination again, I still mean every word. But reading it now, I realize that I have learned much more from Julia than I thought I had...
Yes, Julia is all of these things and then some. But if you notice, I didn't mention Christ once in this email. I didn't give Julia justice in her nomination because I didn't talk about the one thing that meant the most to her, her love for Jesus. Why is that? As I was transitioning to a new town and a new school last week, I was cleaning out my emails when I found this. The absense of Christ's name was the first thing I noticed. I have read this over and over since then, trying to remember why my fingers never typed out the one sentence that explains Julia in a nutshell. As most of you who know her, you probably have done the same thing I have and you have gone back and read all your texts, facebook messages, etc. that you had with Julia. I bet you have read all of her tweets and boy does that gets your heart pumping and a smile on your face. It has honestly become one of my favorite past times. And the reason is because there is so much of Jesus involved in every conversation. I can hear Julia saying "God is SO good" again as I type this out. I see it in our messages, and I hear it in her voice. But what I can't wrap my mind around is why I didn't mention her love for Jesus in an email that was trying to explain who exactly Julia was. What Julia has taught me is that there is so much power in the name of Jesus and that shouldn't be kept a secret from anyone. Whether it be in a conversation or in a simple email, we must be bold. We have to be willing to stand up for what we love. We love Jesus, so why do we shy away from sharing it at times?
I absolutely adore my community. I am who I am because of them and I really learned what community truly means the past few weeks. It looks a lot like holding each other and saying nothing when nothing can be said. And it means a whole lot of prayer. It means a simple hand squeeze and it means driving a few hours just to be together when our world has stopped. It was so easy for us to talk about our love for Christ when we were all together because we are of the same mind and of the same heart. So why is it that when I am emailing a stranger, I didn't mention it at all? I remember contemplating whether or not I should say that she loves Jesus with her whole heart because I knew without a doubt she did, as did everyone in her presence, but I didn't. And I don't know why. I wish I could remember what was going through my head in that moment. I can remember exactly where I was on campus, but I can't remember why I didn't mention Jesus. It wasn't because I didn't think it was worth saying, but it was because I was timid. It's hard for me to even admit this now because I feel ashamed that I hid Jesus from someone, and Julia's love for Jesus. But what I can say is that from now on, I will celebrate Julia and celebrate my love for our Jesus by continuously being bold and continuously proclaiming the GOOD news because our God is SO good. Julia said this every chance she could and she meant it every time. I pray that through Julia's life, we can celebrate how special she was to each of us BECAUSE of how bold she was. Her love and joy gave her that boldness and I will forever be grateful for Julia teaching me this simple truth.
Julia, the main member of my book club and Twerk Team, has taught me a lot in the two years I knew her. But she will continue to teach me for the rest of my life. And until I get to dance with her again in heaven with Jesus, I will dance and rejoice in the fact that she is with our Savior and she is teaching Him how to do "the Julia" (the world's most advanced dance move). I miss not being able to hug Julia again and the thought sometimes drives me crazy, but I can rest in the fact that I will see her again, and until that day, I pray that you dance with so much life that your neck hurts, because Julia did. I pray that anytime you see an owl or hear the word 'joy' that you think of Julia. I pray that we be bold because our God is sovereign and is SO good.
#celebratejulia
If you were unable to make it to Julia's celebration, here is the link to watch it online.
http://vimeo.com/gwinnettchurch/review/72773293/c3db5141c4
